Loneliness is natural
There are times in life when you feel lonely and others where you experience loneliness. They are wildly different. In addition, both can be fruitful times. Just by experiencing those feelings, you can be opened up to decide if change is wanted and what change is needed.
Only the lonely
When I am all by myself, I get to talk to myself and also listen for my own responses. The talking part can get weird attention without the second part. When I exercise, my thoughts can wander freely to evaluate and plan and I can stay in my own head without interruption. Being alone in my own head is the best part of my swimming routine. Aside from noticing what lap I am on or how much longer I get to continue, it is just me alone with my thoughts. As long as I control where they are leading and watch for incorrect ones, it is a time of grace and productivity. I am never lonely when alone.
Comfortably Quiet
Loneliness demands a little more action on my part. When I feel that there is too much empty space around me, it is up to me to solve a critical math problem. If I determine that x needs a y, I have to figure out what the y is. Once I see the outcome of the problem, I can point myself in the right direction. Sometimes that means reaching out to others, sometimes that means entertaining myself and sometimes that means being more productive. Loneliness can be cured many ways and it can rise above the negative brand it carries. There are even times when I am comfortably quiet in my loneliness just to examine how I got there.
Only the Lonely
When you are alone, it is up to you whether you are contentedly by yourself or you are in need of distraction. Only you can feel that inner difference, although many others can project their own feelings onto you. The very times that I have seen my own productivity in loneliness increase were times when others thought they needed to reach out in reaction to my aloneness. The good part is that all attention can be welcome, even when it is misunderstood. If my loneliness appeared to be lonely, I may be making the wrong face. The same goes for times when feeling lonely felt so empty; I wasn’t showing clearly what I needed. The best antidote to all this wondering is interacting more. That is something I can do to dispel the need to even think about which “L” I feel.
What do you do when feeling lonely? Can you enjoy loneliness? How can you tell the difference in those around you?
