The Mystery of Me
There are times when I am a mystery to myself. I have reported previously on the questions I ask myself during the course of a day and their seeming lack of connection to the actual belief of what my brain knows is true. For example, asking myself why I did something. After I ask this now rhetorical question, my mind has to look for an answer and search for acceptable supporting information. If my question is in response to my possibly forging ahead without completely thinking through the results, there are supportive examples available to bolster the circumstances of my error. When I hear myself describe my apparent lack of patience, the brain files open and thousands of previous impatient moments fly out. It might appear to be magic but it is just the way the brain works.
Mystery of Others
Absurdly, when I see this happening to someone else, I feel less special. If I knew earlier that lots of us ask ourselves questions all day long I might have been listening more intently to the ones others were asking just in case there were better questions. Mine seem to be based on behavior gone inept or a failure to wait and develop some options. It does help that I am not alone in this habit but talking to myself doesn’t come off as the most adult method of life review. Of course, sometimes there are just grunts and sighs instead of words but I figure they are all part of my communication standards. I don’t even want to talk about the eyes that roll whenever they want.
Denying the Mystery
Once I catch on to myself, there is really no mystery left. There is just a vague feeling that I am not always the sharpest tack. This can be followed by a little self-talk that piles on. The trick for me is to stop and spotlight the thought as soon as the mystery is discovered as fake. It’s not always easy or pleasant to examine these thoughts especially when they get repeated. They are repeated because I am not really processing them completely. That’s probably due to my impatience noted earlier. Life is a circle and so is my brain talk. But when I do sit with thoughts that should not really belong in my beautiful brain, I make headway. The more they are checked, the more they dissolve.
Mystery Date
There used to be a board game that hid a prospective date behind a little door. The mystery date was lurking behind it and depending on their job and clothing choices could be considered either a good catch or a dud. I now use these identifiers for my thoughts. They are cute and vivid in my brain. Examining thoughts should at least be entertaining. It helps to uncover the mysteries of the way my thoughts occur and give less precious time to the recurring ones that don’t improve my mind management. Attaching a welcoming adjective to the helpful thoughts crowds out the others. The process of second thought is a tool I use in coaching to allow new questions to take form. If you would like to join me in coaching, reach out to me at [email protected] to understand the skill that creates better life results.
Does mystery make something more interesting? Which thoughts of yours are great to catch? Can you let your self-talk discover better answers?
