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Ordinary Bravery

Benign Bravery

The knights of the round table had it easy. They were seen as brave for sitting around a big table fully armed in metal. I am sure it wasn’t easy to get around at times and their muscles sure got a workout. I imagine they often banged into each other while trying to see out of those helmets also. They did have their chances to go to battles to demonstrate real bravery and their horses were certainly brave carrying them around and engaging in jousts for fun.

Meeting Bravery

Today, we meet around tables too, even virtual ones. The faces slide around depending on who is speaking or accidently making noise. But meeting in person always required more bravery. There was always some manager who thought that requiring people to open up to each other wasn’t a total act of vulnerability and required the recitation of fun facts at the start of the meeting. These were opportunities for some to show off and others to let their lack of confidence be known by providing some slightly squeamish fact about themselves it would take a therapist to remove from the memories of others. You know what I mean; I do not need to have any knowledge of your inability to face what to do with your spouse’s hair that was left in the sink. Everyone else is hoping just to start the meeting and get it over with after that.

First Valor

There is a trick to demonstrating bravery at meetings. Going first. Whenever the leading manager wants everyone to contribute, it is best to get it over with. Let me share more. You have been there. The manager read some book that stated a good meeting included everyone getting a chance to give their thoughts and wants to include everyone. The participants didn’t read that same book and think the manager is just trying to embarrass them. There is pressure in presenting your thoughts in any meeting and that is exactly why you should go first. No one is really listening fully. Most are trying to figure out what to say when their turn will eventually arrive. Your thought isn’t going to improve and may actually give the whole conversation its direction. Others will bounce their thoughts off of something you said and your thought just highjacked the whole topic. Good work. You can lean back now and watch everyone else squirm knowing you did your part.

Emotionally Brave

Yes, it takes guts just to throw it out there. But you can take solace knowing that whatever craziness you said will get forgotten in the wealth of ideas that follow. If you are the note taker for the meeting, you have the advantage of recording your suggestion in its corrected form. If you are not the note taker, take refuge in the fact that your addition will just be listed with everyone else’s in a paragraph of lost phrases. But your bravery will be noted. You will be hailed as the person who always brings thoughtful remarks which are shared with confidence. Your skills are automatically elevated; you look like you have leadership potential. So, be brave, speak up; your ideas are worth sharing. And everyone else is now counting on you to start things off.

Participation is judged in meetings whether you think about it or not. How can you make it work for you? Can you convince yourself that your thoughts are just as valid as anyone else’s? Are you trying to convince yourself that you need to emulate someone else’s suggestion for it to have relevance?