Driving on a unlit road with just your head lights requires extra attention and focus, especially when there is little moonlight. Darkness can disguise obstacles and distortion can alter the appearance of common road marks. In the dark, our thoughts are embellished by the uncertainty of the unknown. Negative thoughts can grow out of proportion. The monster lurks under the bed and in the closet. But distortion itself doesn’t have to be good or bad; it is dependent on framing. Jumping to a conclusion without the advantage of all the facts often results in misperception. At least that has been my experience. Passionate individuals and creative thinkers can get away with the distortion of subjects to suit their imagination and express originality or they can create a mess.
When distortion slants choice it can serve as a warning indicator that more knowledge is needed. There are not just two but many sides to most stories and getting all the facts can improve decisions. Rash conclusions are rarely helpful. When you feel rushed to make a decision, does your distortion filter actually keep you from getting to a place where a comfortable decision can be produced? Turn on those high beams and slow down. It’s still a road and goes somewhere; navigate with what you know and challenge all immediate assumptions. You will recognize that feeling of decision steadiness when the right one is reached. You can also recognize wisdom in the recognition that the same decision would have been made in the light of day. Maybe even without hesitation.
Being right is overrated in many cases. Doing right is much more beneficial. The attitude that accompanies each of these scenarios is completely different. It is hard to breathe freely when all you need to be is right. When you choose to do right, a lightness enters you and you feel connected. Human beings like connection; we look at each other’s faces to see if there is any of ourselves there. We want to notice how we appear to be similar because it validates our own thoughts. We pull away from that which is different until we examine and understand the benefit of a divergent thought. We cringe when we realize that our own early distortion helped us to make an error in judgement. We don’t like being wrong. Maybe we can remove some of the sting by thinking that we weren’t wrong, just not fully right or fully knowledgeable. That gives us the chance to learn how to slow down and look for the light needed to negotiate decisions more thoroughly. We learn how to be a good judge; it’s not something we are born with. But if just taking a little extra time is all that is needed to improve, I am willing to invest it. It might even make me look more thoughtful and that is always an improvement.
When do you distort things? What happens when you step back and wait for the light of day to help? Can you shine a light on something and make it new again?
