You are One Person
It seems quite obvious that each of us is just one person. But spending so much time around others reduces solo experiences. With fewer chances to spend time alone, it is easy to get rusty. Being “by yourself” lends itself to a completely different thought process. Because we are social beings, hanging out with other humans provides a lot of good feelings. It gives us the chance to be recognized, notice others and learn more about each other. We are generally attracted to our own species when we feel safe. Sometimes intuition sends a signal to take a fast walk away. Listen to your gut and it will be easier to hear. That intuition is your inner self; don’t ignore that person.
Number One
The number one can mean first, only, or leader and stands in when describing something not done previously. It has a shiny patina. We are drawn to number one. We connect with it. But we don’t always think about the important things in life first. It is super easy to get caught up in what family members need, partners expect, bosses would be impressed by, and friends would envy us for. If you consider any of these in a negative way, those are thoughts that require a little time on the couch in examination. They are only negative because you think of them that way. They have the potential to be equally positive. It’s up to you. Our minds work in mysterious ways.
Start at One
This is a hard question for some to ponder: are you number one in your life? If you immediately rationalize that there are others who require more status than you, you have just told on yourself. Worse than the thought that you are not numero uno is the fact that it is likely you are hiding behind the need-to-number-one folks. It is pretty easy to look more altruistic if you are playing the part of MVP in someone else’s game. After all, it seems so saintly to put others first. I am not sure how that whole thought got started but it has grown wildly out of proportion. Just like the safety experts state in an emergency, your mask needs to be in place first to help someone else. That is a real-life lesson that needs to be applied all over the place. Rethink that thought with “Do unto others after you have done for yourself.”
Better One
Start by asking yourself what two qualities you most want to express in your world. Next, evaluate if you are letting yourself appear to be a person who demonstrates those values. If you are placing an obstacle in front of your purpose, discover why it is there by looking behind it. If you can choose to focus on placing yourself first in ways that count to you, you will increase your own satisfaction. When we are better to ourselves, we naturally want to make things better for others. You may also find that you have been the obstacle to someone else having the chance to put themselves first. Dominos fall when we improve our relationships with each other. The slight shift in how we treat ourselves will ripple out to those in your care. Being a role model in better inner care gives permission to those who look to you for guidance and love to be better also.
Can you incrementally improve yourself? What would happen if you put yourself first? Do you really think that you are indispensable?
