Shallow Praise
Thousands of words have been written in an attempt to get managers to abandon the use of the words “good job” or make completely meaningless remarks to those who have accomplished their own tasks and then some. The brain tells the manager that this is what they are supposed to do because they are a leader and they blindly follow this inadequate advice. So sad. Those hearing the words know how the deal works and again feel disappointed by the lack of specificity shown. The blanket statement becomes a joke and instead of elevating the employee, they are left to wonder why they bother. And please, let’s ditch the thumbs up thing.
Regular Praise
Some folks think that more frequent recitation of shallow praise helps. Another miss. Repeating the words in email, in meetings and even in discussions continues the habit. It is not that the words are thoughtless but they are without thought. They lack even in repetition. There are so many really heartfelt words to use that it may appear to be lazy just to follow the established practice. If you hear yourself starting to notice the great work of another human, you can take a moment to say something special. Build your vocabulary. Write an email that someone might want to read. Or even keep.
Need Less Praise
There is a whole new level that some of us use to leave the sting of shallow praise behind. We compliment our own worthy work. My own accomplishments are much more meaningful to me and I can recognize when I have even impressed myself. This habit eliminates the need to perform for others to get their attention and frees me from the outside chance I could be influenced by a manager’s praise of the task that didn’t deserve it. I pay attention to my inner self-talk and trust myself to determine what to do when confronted with a problem. That makes me better able to really enjoy my own work and accomplishments. I thank the one who really deserves the kudos instead of waiting for a manager, who didn’t get his praise bucket filled up by his boss, figure out how to rise above their own internal issues and be a gracious leader. I keep an accomplishment list to review and remember what I am capable of completing.
Last Praise
Think about the last time you were really praised. That feeling is important because if it was genuine, you probably felt emboldened to do even better. Imagine what a few heartfelt words of praise would do for someone today. Imagine if you started your day with the intention of finding the good in you. It’s there and at the end of a long day, there is something good to remember and shower some elevated thoughts on your actions. Real praise does wonders.
What is the word of praise you want to hear? Can you think of three new words to show your appreciation to someone in your circle? What would the ripple effect be in a world of real approval?
