Silence is so Loud
We tend to covet rare objects. Silence is one of those on my list. I seek it out because it seems so special or precious. A lot of life has to be quiet to find silence because there are beeping things all around me. All of the background noises of life get louder when the usual volume of life is turned down. Walking into a home coming home from vacation is usually strange. We bring life back with the noise.
Silence is Golden
We were taught this one early. This direction came from someone else needing some silence. The universal signal of vertically pressing an index finger against your lips gives the all quiet alert. We don’t like being shushed, especially in the movie theater, because we think it infringes on our freedom to make noise. It’s the polite equivalent of telling someone to shut up. In my mother’s house, that was not allowed. We have an accompanying universal aversion to this direction. This is not golden silence to us; it is control.
Benefits of Silence
Silence has beneficial qualities. It helps our brain cells grow in the memory region. We need those. And we crave silence after a lot of noisy activity like car racing, concerts or hearing a baby cry. We all know what distress that causes. It must be great to command that much attention by just waking up with a wet diaper. Silence can trigger us to take a little self-time. Throwing everyone out of the house to be alone works well. A cup of tea and some silence induces our ability to relax and let out that big sigh that has been hiding inside of us. Teachers used to place students into corners to maintain some silence. Staring at a corner is totally boring and makes it easier to review whatever behavior was in question.
The Silent Treatment
This is not a gentle way to get back at anyone. At first glance, it seems super passive-aggressive. But some of us just need a little time and space before responding. That can be misinterpreted as the silent treatment. It is important to be clear enough to say that a little time-out is needed when this is a natural part of your process. Processing information is different for all of us. The little break allows for a delay in the first response. And considering options is always a spectacular idea. Your first answer is rarely your best. For those who need to experience the beauty of the still of night silence or the silence that occurs when watching someone sleep or some quiet time spent in nature, the silent treatment is life changing. Silence can be a valuable resource; it just depends on how you it sounds to you.
How often do you crave silence? What do you automatically think when you see someone wearing headphones? How can you use silence to benefit you?
