What did you just think?
Thinking of You
We want our thoughts to sound like Hallmark cards. Every holiday, similar sentiments are shared on colorful cards. There is little variation from year to year for each occasion. These act as a basis for the standard of how to share greetings. Our brains act a little differently. The thoughts that my mind creates aren’t always polite. They aren’t always generous. They aren’t always sharable. It isn’t as if we sit around trying to conjure up these thoughts. They aren’t deliberate. They just seem to appear out of nowhere. Why is it that we can’t control our own thoughts? Usually, these thoughts are based on some old information or outlook we absorbed from someone else. They may also be based on some comparison ideology. Comparison always has a rejection background. You can prove this point by comparing your most recent picture to one taken last year. One of them will score higher on the rejection score.
Thinking Ahead
Most of us spend more time thinking about events that have happened in the past than planning for the future. We review the past to see if we can get it right in our heads the next time. The best retorts usually don’t appear in our heads until after the point when they would have been most useful. If you have had a full conversation in your head in which you acquitted yourself perfectly compared with what happened in real life, you understand. This isn’t wasted though. Feeling better about the conversation is a bit of a win. And you don’t really have to come out on top with every discussion. The actual rebuttal teaches you how to prepare better for interactions. Nothing is wasted.
Think about Forgiveness
This week let’s self-coach on the option of forgiveness. The act of forgiving someone has a deep attachment to beliefs we absorbed in our youth. This sounds religious but it is really practical. Knowing when and how to create a moment of forgiveness is a superpower. To practice, think about a few ways to forgive yourself. What beautiful words come to mind when you want to help yourself get past a seemingly difficult moment? Say these out loud to yourself when you are taking the time to do your hair. Make it a ritual. Think about one way each day to apologize for a past event that didn’t go exactly as planned. This is crucial to putting the past in the past as well as gently improving your feelings. When you run out of things to forgive yourself for, start on whoever needs to be forgiven next. You know who I mean. Nobody gets through this whole life without being a little demon. Saying you are sorry now doesn’t require the person to be with you. This act will change the way you feel about them and doesn’t even require their participation. It is magic. You will begin to feel lighter.
Think of a Word
Let’s tie this in with one-word journalling. The first word of the day that pops into your mind as soon as you wake up is the one you want to catch. You have to try a little harder to start up this practice since our minds can be a little foggy when we first open our eyes. Perhaps a nice post-it note will increase the chances of you being prompted. Attach it to your nightstand or alarm if possible. This might be a leftover word from bedtime last night. If it has been lurking all night to wake you up, journal it to see why it slept over. Eventually, you will want to create the first intentional word of the day, so this is not a wasted exercise. It will transform after you have exhausted the usual process of waking up with yesterday’s thoughts still hanging around. Choosing the word of the day is a little like a game from sixth grade but you score yourself. If you don’t judge the word immediately and just remember to journal it for a week or two, you will see the power. Your morning attitude is critical to how you will feel. Try to make it a singing in the shower day instead of a there is soap in my eyes again day.
Thinking about your first words is like a game. You don’t know what is going to pop up until you open your eyes. What word are you hoping to think tomorrow morning?
